Thursday, September 18, 2014

My fault or not

It is neither by my might or grace, the lord almighty sent me a guy so amazing

I saw him and knew he was the one for me. My pastor saw us and said I had met my rib. No going back

The gifts came in bundles. The care and attention were unrivaled. I was bathing in the euphoria of being loved.

He liked us being together all the time. He never wanted me out of his sight. Oh this love!

My man showed up at the oddest times. When I least expected. With wonderful suprises. Who could do it better?

All the girls were jealous of me? They couldn't hide their anger. Oh lordy lord! I'd be grateful to you now and always. Thanks for sending this packaged gift in the form of a handsome man my way.

We did everything together, we rubbed minds and bodies. Nothing was left behind in our amazing journey towards being together forever. This dream'd better not end!

The first time he slapped me, it was due to my own carelessness and nosy attitude. Why was I trying to snoop through his phone?

He apologised and took me out to dinner. It was one of the most wonderful nights ever. Followed by a passionate bout of love making you don't wanna know about.

The love between my man and I couldn't be surpassed by any other. The slaps and random spanks came more frequently. But I caused them, I deserved them.

We got engaged and were married before I knew it. I left my job at my husband's command. After all, he could pay me twice the amount the job offered.

The night he got drunk, I accused him of being irresponsible and he beat me with his belt so much that there was blood everywhere. I was so sorry, my husband only got drunk because he was stressed, why did I provoke him to anger?

By midnight, he was apologising and giving me promises of the world. What an amazing lover! Apologising for my own wrong doings? I'm wowed.

The woman next door came around someday to tell me she hears my screams and yells and I shld report to the nearest police station. I ushered her out. She was only jealous. Her man wasn't half what my man was.

Pregnancies came and went like lightening. The regular beatings my husband gave me wouldn't let them stay. Not his fault still, why was I being less of a woman by not holding a pregnancy still.

It is seven years now, there has been a baby, a cute baby. Just as adorable as my man. It was fine. Until he ran her over with his car on the day he rushed home to confront me with accusations of infidelity because I wasn't picking up my phone.

The baby is gone, buried without anyone knowing the true story. I couldn't afford to be blamed because truly I was guilty. Why would I not pick my husband's call when he needed to talk to me? Ah!

My husband's constant beatings stopped for a while and then resumed on the day he saw my car at the hospital without me giving him prior notice I was going there. Hubby, i'm sorry, I wasn't feeling too well, I should have called u earlier so I deserve this punishment.

Sometimes, a voice whispers that I shld leave but I can't, where would I go to? Who would be as wonderful as this man? After all, my pastor said he is the one. Be gone to hell, you terrible voice of doom!

The doctor says there is a problem with me. A terminal disease coupled with depression. I can't tell anyone, not my loving husband. What right did I have to have a disease and want to leave him in the world?

So here I am, being the loving wife, accepting my husband's punishment constantly and praying I don't leave him soon. I love my husband. He is the best. He treats me well and doesn't joke with me. The punishments are just a means of righting my wrongs and I deserve them. Don't I?.....

 

The above writeup is basically to express what so many women go through in their matrimonial homes and even before marriage. I saw a movie sometime back titled 'unforgivable' and I couldn't stop myself from weeping. Also, a woman at my mum's workplace got killed by her husband after she had been going through series of beatings and ignored people's advise to leave.

When did domestic violence get this bad? Women die everyday from constant pounding by their husbands and most are too scared too leave. What do you think about domestic violence? Have u had any experience of it? What is the major cause of this violence? Does anyone deserve to be beaten by his/her spouse? What could be done to stop this? Let's discuss... BOS